Throughout my 19 years, 11 months and 5 days of existence, I have always taken certain privileges for granted. Not having to cook is one of them. Today, in an earnest attempt to break away from my dependence on others, I decided to try making some popcorn – I have seen it done a couple of times. How hard could it possibly be?
I turned on the stove and watched 2 spoonfuls of butter melt into a yellow pool of grease. Next, I opened a packet of Pick n Pay No-name Popcorn. But in my haste, nearly half a packet of mealies went in the pot before I could regain control, while another couple of handfuls fell to the floor. I did not expect such slipperiness from a bunch of corn-crusted seedlings. How dare they create such a cumbersome mess for me to clean up?!?!!
Never mind. There was no use crying over spilt milk, or so the saying goes. My spirits rose a little when I heard the first ‘pop’, but it soon took a dive when a burning smell ensued. The fluffy white miniature puffs suddenly went FUBAR (f—–d up beyond all recognition).
After some thorough investigation, I came up with a couple of causes pertaining to the popcorn disaster.
- The stove was on maximum temperature. (In my defence, I have never even used that thing. Ignorance gets the blame here.)
- Too little butter and too much corn. (I need to work on the golden ratio a bit more, but guesstimating 0.618 isn’t easy I tell ya!)
Needless to say, my attempt at domestication failed, but hopefully everything will run smoother next time.